Luc senses a hole in his life.
It bothers him for weeks. He thinks that it results from a drastically paralyzing daily routine which can not be carried on properly. He used to be a punctual student, wake up at 7 and be on time at school at 9. Although he knows learning another foreign language is not his priority, he still tries to enjoy it, and maybe somehow he does. To be with classmates, to be praised by the teachers, to utilise his talent in communication, and to impress everyone how rapidly he can catch up the phrases and grammars give him the pleasure. However, all the routine has the same fatal factor which would be generated by itself inevitably, boredom, not to mention this is not obligatory routine but a chosen one.
Additionally, this moment in his life, for Luc, is not crystal clear. Leaving his country to a strange place to settle down with merely a vague vision of what he might want or try to do and all these restrictions a foreign place could bring, language barrier, culture difference, racism, and self-esteem issue, he finally realizes it is more difficult to be yourself right here right now. As if one looks at the foggy sight with scratched dirty goggles, not promising at all.
Is it the place and timing? They say it tops the third place of highest suicide rate on this planet. It still snows in March, which is more considered to be so called spring time. It is not really depressing to him. It just lasts too long, like his own blear condition. He knows it would be too passive to sit and wait for a breakthrough point, but he feels there is nothing he can actually progress.
He senses a hole in his life, when he looks it in the face.
(image source: http://missmelinus.deviantart.com/gallery/ by linus l.)
